My Dearest Yui,
You are now five years old and growing up so fast.
I still remember when my sister, your Mommy, was still conceiving you. I was so excited about you though I didn’t show it. With my meager income then, I bought you those little things that you could use or your Mom could use on you. I dont remember them now but I still do remember that time while choosing them. Haha! But trust me, we were all so looking forward to your birth.
Until that fateful day when we learned of your ‘condition’. I felt like the whole world was crashing on me (and I couldn’t even imagine how your parents felt especially your Mom). I thought that you didn’t (and still dont) deserve that. It came to a point when I questioned God why He would take on you the lessons He wanted us to learn. Coz I didnt think He wanted you to learn a thing at birth. It was totally unfair!
I was in the hospital when your Mom was in labor. I was praying that my sister would not experience the difficulty your delivery. I was praying that everything the doctor said about you wasn’t true. I was praying for a miracle.
I didnt get my miracle.
But two of the three conditions were dismissed, I sort of felt relieved. But the thought of seeing you the first time scared me. No, I wasnt afraid of looking at you because of your physical condition. I was scared of my reaction when I finally did. I didnt want to break down and cry. You didnt deserve that. In fact, no other baby did. I psyched myself to be strong. I didnt have the right to be weak coz it was the last thing your parents needed.
When I saw you at the hospital’s nursery that first time, my heart had filled with so much love and care for you I never thought I was capable of.
Your very existence brought so much joy to me and to our little family. You were a very ‘delicate’ baby, your needs required 100% time and attention.
Back then, I was scared of carrying you. You were so small. Plus the fact that I didnt know how to raise babies and my ignorance would cause you discomfort.
But I did remember feeding you your milk. Several times. Though in all those times, I was extremely careful. Feeding you took time and required my attention. Early in your infancy and while I was feeding you, you were always so cheerful and smiling. The more I thought you didnt deserve it all. But then you were so oblivious to that fact and you would continue to smile at me and every thought was forgotten and all I could think of was how much, as each day passed, my love for you was growing.
What you had gone through as a baby was so much.
But you grew up to be such a sweet and loving kid, Yui. You are always cheerful and your smile and your eyes brighten the day of everyone around you. You always wake me up every time you sleep over but your hugs and kisses and ‘good morning, tita’, ‘i love you, tita’ are what I get in return anyways.
Yui, always remember that Tita Leng loves you so very much. I cant show you how much but I DO.
Yui @ 11 months
On My Birthday
Yui’s 1st Birhday cake..from Me!!!!
calling someone..
Lola Ge’s birthday
The Diary of Lianne D 